"

“How are you only seventeen?” They said,
“how are you so young but have all this
going on in your head?”

I don’t know,
I really don’t. I can’t explain
to you why I think death is the answer to
my problem, I can’t tell you why I think
soul mates exists because when I met
him it made me believe in something,
and fuck, isn’t that better than nothing?
I can’t speak about the scars on my thighs
because each one of them, according to
you were caused by lies, the lies that I told
myself, that I was too ugly, too fat, too dumb.
I still don’t see them as lies, because god
damn you don’t see myself through my eyes.
I won’t open up to you about how he ripped a
piece of my being away from me that night,
and no, I won’t open up about how every
evening there’s a fight. I will maybe tell you
about my mother, and how she thinks I am
crazy, and strange. I could never tell you face
to face about my suicide attempt, and how
I had it arranged. I won’t talk to you about
anything, nothing, not even over a phone
call. You’ll have to read my writing,
because trust me, it explains it all.

"
- i.c. // don’t ask, read (via delicatepoetry)

(via lonelyscribbles)

"I hope you know that I’m not just here for the way your bones feel against mine or the way you kiss me like this is the end of the world. I’m here to wake you when you start crying in your sleep and I’m here to clean up the blood when your breathing gets shallow. I’m here to hold you back when you try to jump and I’m here to hold your hand when I can’t stop you. and I love the way you say my name and the way you look when it’s cold out. I’m here for every bit of you. Even the messy bits. and that’s how it will always be. We fell in love two years ago when we were tired and it was raining hard on both of us but I would stand out in a storm forever if it meant I got to fall asleep next to you."
- (via extrasad)

(via lonelyscribbles)

"I remember my mother brushing my hair
out of my eyes and wiping my teardrops off
her tired hands and she called me sugarplum
and told me to remember that boys can’t break
you in half, stars burn out but the sky never
goes dark, and your chest will always be filled
with light even when it feels like you’re on fire
but last summer I was sucking on cherry
lollipops till my tongue turned red and kissing
your neck and now I’m biting my lip so hard that
I spit up blood and falling asleep in the shower
because it’s the only place you haven’t touched"
- I think you burned me out (via extrasad)

(via lonelyscribbles)

"

september 19// 3:09 am
ur not mine anymore but im urs i’ll always fucking be urs it’s so sick u ripped my chest open n left me laying on the bathroom floor to rot but we both know that if u showed up at my house 6 yrs from now looking for a heart to break I’d give u mine all over again
[delivered]

september 27// 2:07 am
i just wanted to tell u that i miss u
[delivered]

september 27// 4:16 am
i rly fuckin miss u
[delivered]

november 18// 5:14 pm
i kissed someone else today n he didn’t make my mouth bleed the way u always did but i still wished u were the one i was kissing
[delivered]

december 4// 3:38 am
ur such a dick lol
[delivered]

december 4// 3:41 am
im still in love w u
[delivered]

december 16// 8:16 am
omf it’s still hard to sleep without u what the fuck did u do to me u were the kind of boy who tasted like stars and kissed like outer space but u turned my insides black
[delivered]

march 11// 4:02 pm
this boy told me he loved me and i want so badly to get butterflies n to grab him and kiss him bc i think he’s good u know like maybe he won’t break me but every time he says it i just get sick bc i can’t stop thinking about all the times u told me u loved me and probably never meant it
[delivered]

april 17// 5:22 am
u ruined me
[delivered]

april 21// 11:19 pm
i’d still kiss u if i could
[delivered]

may 8// 4:06 am
ur drunk and u just left me a voicemail and i think it was an accident but this is the first time i’ve heard ur voice in months and i can’t stop shaking and i miss u i miss u
[delivered]

june 4// 3:17
ur eyes were like one of those pretty spiderwebs covered in raindrops that look like diamonds and i got trapped in u and u ate me alive what the fuck i just wanted to hold ur hand
[delivered]

june 13// 2:17 pm
my mom just asked what happened to us and i threw up
[delivered]

"
- 13 texts I shouldn’t have sent (via extrasad)

(via lonelyscribbles)

"we were
and then we weren’t
sometimes people fall asleep in love
and wake up empty
sometimes people fall asleep
and don’t wake up at all
and it hurts
until it doesn’t
and you don’t always feel it at first
but when you feel it
oh god do you feel it
and sometimes we bleed ourselves
dry before we can feel okay again
and sometimes the scars don’t fade
like the doctor said they would
and i know sometimes I come home
with my knees torn apart and
lips that taste like cherries and blood
and one day I’ll be spitting up your
name and I won’t be able to taste
anything but you
and you
and you
and I can’t stop my heart from falling
out of it’s chest
and I can’t fall asleep knowing that I
might wake up and not be yours
because tonight we are
but who knows if you’ll still love me in the morning"
- (via extrasad)

(via lovealways-mary)